Thursday, May 16, 2013

Ahhh...life....

So we all know that I am not the most consistent blogger....I blog when I feel inspired or when I am not working....and tomorrow is my last day of work for the summer...can I get a "whoop, whoop"....So, a lot has gone on this year. Health stuff was the #1 big thing that happened. Still recovering from that, but everything seems to be working itself out, which is a huge blessing! Another big thing is that I went from telling my boss, school principal, that this year would be my last year teaching (part-time) to signing a contract to teach 1st grade full time next year. Long story short, it is a God thing and I am crazy excited! Life has been really great lately. Derek and I are at an awesome place in our marriage, the kids have been super fun lately, and work has been amazing. We have also been spending some quality time with our friends and family, which is great.
I didn't write this blog post to do an update, that was just an added bonus! I did write it because my dear friend Jenna posted recently about "the type of mom she wanted to be" and I thought is was a great way to put is out there, to hold myself accountable for who I want to be....so here it goes!

The kind of mom I want to be (to MY kids)
*To teach them that our God is a loving, compassionate God, that loves people for who they are, no matter what mistakes have been made.
* PLAY with them....I mean like on the floor 100% present during play time. I feel like I do a pretty good job at this, but I know with the up coming job, it may be a little more difficult. But...it is very important to me that my children remember me as a mom who got down and played with them.
* Foster their creativity and development. As a teacher this is incredibly important to me. I do not want my children watching T.V. all day or playing video games every minute they are awake. I want to create activities that enhance their imaginations and help them to be problem solvers and critical thinkers.
*To teach them as much as I can about...EVERYTHING! People told me I was crazy and pushy for teaching Ben his letters at 18 months....but he was fully capable. I need to make sure that I don't put a limit on what they can learn simply because of their age...in fact, to realize that they are sponges and it is more important now than ever to feed them knowledge!
* To teach them to be polite and to be gentlemen.
*I want to show them how to be healthy...what they eat, to be active, but also allow them to have a treat....and really, my goal would be to teach them moderation (in every aspect in life).
* To show them that everyone makes mistakes
* Allow them to explore and get dirty!
*Know that it is okay that I do not have the cleanest prettiest house
* To teach them that they are in charge of their own happiness....and hopefully they will take this into their adult lives and find careers that challenge them and make them happy men/husbands/whatever. I was taught to do what you are passionate about and I hope to pass that to my children. Being successful will come with being 100% happy with what you do on a day to day basis. I truly believe that each of us has a God given talent, and I hope that my boys find theirs and USE that talent.
* To not just tolerate people who are different than them, but to celebrate those difference and to fully accept all walks of life, and to love people the way the Jesus would love them, without judgement.
*To not yell as much, I do struggle with this and have to remind myself that they are still babies!
*To hold them accountable for their actions and to allow them to make mistakes and teach them what lessons they can learn from those mistakes.
* Be an example of a healthy marriage, bickering and all....
* Teach them to be good friends.

Every night when I go to bed I ask myself "what could I have done differently..." I am always trying to better myself as a wife, a mother, a friend, teacher. It is important for me to always be growing and evolving. I am still a firm believer in some controversial issues....but I also know that those opinions could change at the drop of a hat. When I talk about being a better mom I also want to be more open minded about those who do things differently. What works for me may not work for everyone and the same goes for others. What works for others does not work for me. And with saying that...what worked for my first boy may not work for my second, or third (when/if that time comes)

So, there it is. I honestly could go on and on, but I fell as though it is a good start. I hope that I will refer to this to keep myself on track!



Sunday, February 3, 2013

Favorite Things Party

   Last weekend I hosted my first Favorite Things Party. It was a lot of fun. Here are the *logistics of a favorite things party in case you are wondering....

1. Invite several friends....you will need at least 5 people to come to the party.
2. In the invite you tell everyone to bring their favorite thing under $6...and they bring 5 of that item.
3. I asked everyone to wrap their gift up in a cute way...who doesn't love a cute little package to unwrap?
4. Buy a lot of wine and a lot of yummy snacks!
5. When everyone gets to your house have them write their name down 5 times on pieces of paper and put them in a jar.
6. Once everyone is there and their bellies are full...pass the jar with all the names around the room. 
7. Everyone will draw 5 names (no repeats and not their own name)....the 5 names you draw are who gets your favorite thing.
8. Go around the room one at a time, pass out your gift and explain why that is your favorite thing....

*There are several ways to do go about having your favorite things party...I chose to do it this way. Some bloggers have talked about how they do not wrap the gifts but set them on a table and you draw a number and you essentially get to "shop" for the 5 items you would like. I chose not to do it this way so that feelings would not be hurt if your favorite thing wasn't highly desired....and if you are the last person to "shop" it seems kind of unfair!

We had so much fun! It was a great alternative to ladies night out...and I hope to continue with this theme a couple of times a year.

Some favorite things that people brought....
Lotion, favorite headband, favorite cooking utensil,  earrings, Poopourri, Eye make-up remover, soup in a jar, Chapstick, nailpolish....all really wonderful things!

Here are some pictures from our evening...






 

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Life...

So as we are entering a new year there is a lot on my mind. I have a lot to be thankful for. We had a pretty great year. Watching my littlest turn from a baby to a strong willed toddler, watching my two sons turn into the best of friends, Derek and I at a super great place in our marriage...and so much more.
But to be honest there really is one main thing on my mind...about a month ago I dealt with some not so good medical news that we are actually still dealing with. I guess I will start at the beginning...I thought I was about 8 weeks pregnant when I went to the doctor, they couldn't find a heartbeat....but that didn't really scare me since with Ben and Sully it was about 10 weeks until I heard the heart beat. I was scheduled to have an ultrasound the next week....I knew something was wrong when the tech wasn't talking at all...the doctor called me withing about 30 minutes and wanted me to get blood work done to check for pregnancy hormone levels....so I did that immediately. I did it that day and two days later...they were rising but but doubling. So I was told I would have a miscarriage because the fetal pole never looked to grow beyond 4 weeks or so....I continued to have blood work done and all of the sudden they were spiking, so then he doctor thought that maybe I was just very early in pregnancy and that everything could possibly be ok. So I went back in for an ultrasound...I got a call the next day to come in and see my doctor....I knew that couldn't be good. When we got to the doctor he pulled us into a room and told me thought I was having a molar pregnancy...which is when tumors grow in your body instead of a baby. I immediately went to a specialist where he told me he wasn't positive that it was a molar pregnancy, maybe just a blighted ovum...which is still bad but with a blighted ovum I can get pregnant within months....but with a molar pregnancy I have to wait a full year. I was scheduled for a D&C the next day. I have that procedure done and was called the next week. It was in fact a molar pregnancy...and even worse a complete molar pregnancy. Now, the problem with molar pregnancy is that the cells and tumors can grow back, and then I have to have Chemo to get rid of the cancer. There is a 25% chance that I will have to have Chemo...which I realize means that there is a 75% that I won't have to, but to me 25% is not a super small percentage. And chemo....that's scary...will I feel sick...will I be always tired...will I lose my hair....all thoughts that go through my head everyday. I have to have blood work done on a consistent basis...if my HCG (pregnancy hormones) do not go down to 0 and stay at 0 for consecutive months that is when we will know I need to start treatment. Which is also why we have to wait a year to try to get pregnant. Because my levels could go up and down we have to wait to make sure I am in the clear and so a real pregnancy doesn't get confused with the cancer. It has really been an awful experience. We haven't really told anyone but our families...but I figured it was time to share this scary time in our lives. And do not get me wrong...this doesn't consume us, I know I am not going to die from this. Worse case scenario is Chemo....and there is a super tiny percentage that the cancer spreads...but that is such a small percentage that I do not even entertain that idea. We just cannot believe this has happened...